It’s a beautiful beginning to the month, and I spent most of the day shopping in some form or another. Kohl’s was having a big sale, so Moon scored bunches of jeans, socks, sweaters, pajamas and unmentionables while I got a sweater and a nightshirt. Then we stocked up on our usual foodstuffs at Trader Joe’s. I bought caulk at Ace Hardware, swim goggles and shampoo at Simply Swimming, and a new mascara at Sephora.

Quite a bit of economy stimulation for just one day. At least for us.

This morning also marked my first swim lesson since… well, since Water Babies when I was a mere toddler. I’ve already learned a lot (elbows/kicks/breathing) and I can’t wait to try it out when I do laps on Monday. The new goggles ought to help because I’ve been opening and closing my eyes as I crawl, which often leads to running into the side of the pool.

In other news, I’ve been thinking a lot about this. It’s been about six weeks off meds, and this past week or so has been a struggle. I know it’s my brain, because there is no good external reason for all this angst and anxiety. On paper, my life is pretty damn sweet. But my brain keeps sending waves of dread at random times, and I don’t know what I’m supposed to be dreading.

What’s more, I have anxiety related to going back on meds, even though I’ve got lots of experience with them, and I’m able to get results with a much lower than normal dose. It would be awesome if my dietary changes, exercise habit, spiritual practice and so forth would be enough to make me feel like my regular self. Not sure I’m willing to wait much longer to see if that’s going to happen.

Let’s see what happens this month, shall we?